The Last Three Weeks

I am still riding the high from the bar mitzvah service and the gala. I have been thinking about both a lot. In the case of the gala, it’s always the best night of the year. Everything about it was abundantly extravagant. I loved the decorations, and the silent auction. I loved seeing everyone so dressed up. Certainly the presentation was the highlight, of course. Judy looked like a queen up there. And that moment when your photo comes up is just the greatest. It is wonderful to feel proud, and to know that you are a member of the most wonderful community on earth. 

In a very different way, the bar mitzvah has deeply affected me. It is very difficult to explain how we all felt sitting there that day in the synagogue. It was, in part, that one of us was accomplishing the impossible. Certainly I was very emotional about that. But it was more than that. Typically when we get excited, our bodies get more dysregulated. But the opposite happened: we were completely at peace in our own skins. Instead of heightened emotion leading to an increase in OCD and stimming, our OCD and stimming vanished. 

I myself did not stim or OCD even once during that service.  You could hear a pin drop in there. 

How did I feel? Like I was wrapped in a warm, soft blanket of perfect love. It was so wonderful that there are no words that can adequately describe it. 

I feel changed by that experience. I know now that God exists. And the world seems more beautiful because of that.