Fear

People need to understand more about who nonspeakers really are. We can read others’ feelings easily, and know that most people are afraid of us. People don’t like what is different from them, and boy!...are we different. That’s kind of an understatement, to be honest. We are loud, and our bodies are not in control. We begin to stim, and people freak out. Talking for myself, I perceive fear often in others. It is so ubiquitous that I can tune it out at times. 

But sometimes it hurts. We are only scary if you don’t get us. My hope is that someday the sight of a nonspeaker will evoke as much reaction as a lightbulb…and that no one will bombard me with fear again. I believe that one day we will not inspire fear so much; after all, there are a lot of us.

The thing that inspired the writing of this was an incident that happened at the Jets game two weeks ago. My OCD made me take a child’s water bottle. He freaked out, understandably, and I felt sick over it. His fear totally washed over me. Maybe people won’t get so scared someday to have someone like me do that. 

For all my life, I always felt fear everywhere.  I hope it stops.